Power

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Power 〰️

The Edinburgh Fringe is back for 2026, and with it, our annual feature series! This year, we’re taking on POWER: Who’s got it? Where is it? Where should it be? How do you get it? Our comedians are the only ones with the answers.

By Bilal Zafar

Sleeping too late, waking up late, eating too many chocolate bourbons and getting a tummy ache. That is how I was living for almost two years. You only realise that these things are evil when you feel better.

I did my first ever open mic gig in 2013, went on to do well in comedy competitions, got signed by a big agent and in 2016 (10 years ago!) I was nominated for Best Newcomer at the Edinburgh Fringe. These were all great things to brag about on Facebook as I was getting record numbers of ‘likes’.

Over the last 10 years, I’ve been lucky enough to do some amazing things, like a Radio 4 Stand up show, acting in the film Last Christmas with Emma Thompson and Emilia Clarke, giving my views on some adverts on Channel 5 Best British Ads (which I filmed 3 years ago but seems to repeated every week).

I also got very close to so many things that feel like they would’ve propelled me to finally being on Strictly Come Dancing one day. Those opportunities can sometimes literally keep me up at night because the meetings and exciting emails gradually began to dry up.

Sometimes I don’t know how I managed to go eight years being able to live off of stand up and occasional acting work. I got married a few years ago and shortly after, we discovered that my wife has endometriosis and she had to leave her job. (If you don’t know what endometriosis is, please look it up, an estimated 1.5 people in the UK have it.) Pressure began to mount.

Anyway, my point is that I was getting less regular work and lots of gigs like to pay you when they feel like it, which is not ideal. I knew I had to get a day job but the thought of it made me feel like a failure and I was embarrassed to even tell anyone.

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I now work as a Teaching Assistant for a year 2 class in a mainstream primary school. Initially, I was hoping this is something I would only do for about a month before getting rescued by a chance to be on a Sky panel show I had never heard of or something.

After about a week at this job, I began to enjoy myself, my new sense of responsibility and my new routine and it helps that I seem to actually be good at this job. I was waking in a good mood which made me realise that I had spent about two years waking up with anxiety in my chest.

Yes, sometimes doing a gig very late and then having to be in school in the early morning is tough, but I really love doing both of those things at the moment. I do miss being able to sleep as much as I wanted but I think I was turning into a cat.

I feel like I had been brainwashed into thinking that the only way to be happy was to be on loads of TV channels but I was being stupid and now I feel like I’ve taken control of my life again.

Bilal Zafar: Rubicon is running at Underbelly Bristo Square (Jersey) from Aug 5-27th, 20:30. Tickets here

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