Emmeline Downie: Agony Aunt Gail helps you take your power back
Power
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Power 〰️
Image: Rebecca Need-Menear
The Edinburgh Fringe is back for 2026, and with it, our annual feature series! This year, we’re taking on POWER: Who’s got it? Where is it? Where should it be? How do you get it? Our comedians are the only ones with the answers.
By Gail (aka Emmeline Downie)
Dear Agony Aunt Gail,
I wondered if you might be able to help. I have a birthday coming up (the big 3-0) and I’m currently feeling lost in life. My self-esteem is in the toilet and I’ve lost all power and direction. I feel as though all my friends are doing really well in their lives; they’re getting married, having babies and buying houses and I’m stuck in a houseshare with people I don't really know. I feel like I’m being left behind. What should I do?
Yours,
Lost In London
Dear Lost in London,
What a sorry state of affairs! Those are some of the bleakest sentences I’ve ever read and I’ve read A Little Life. It was my book group book in January. Safe to say it was NOT my choice. If I wanted to spend hours dwelling on someone else’s tedious trauma, I’d call my mother! Anyway, it sounds like you need to take control of the ship that is your life. Ask yourself: What is my ship for? Transporting cargo? Performing military operations? Pleasure cruising? You have to find your purpose. Like in Captain Phillips when the passionate and very cheeky young man says “I am the Captain now”, you are the captain, now.
In terms of your self-esteem, there must be something you like about yourself? Do you have slim calves, for example? Or very neat handwriting? And with regards to the houseshare, have you thought about moving out and buying a luxury penthouse in the bustling heart of the UK’s metropolis? This is a simple solution and would be much nicer than renting with a load of randoms.
So your friends are getting married and having babies and you feel left behind. Have you considered getting in front? What could you do first that they haven’t done? Have they met a ghost, written a best-selling work of non-fiction, or been to Paris? There are plenty of firsts you could achieve — you just need to think creatively.
Plus, getting married isn’t the be all and end all. Well, it’s never worked out for me. I’m modest enough to admit that I don’t have it all sussed. I can’t claim to have mastered love nor cooking. My local fire department will testify on both counts! If you’re after a romantic liaison with a woman, then more power to your elbow! I’m not best placed to advise, however, as I don’t have any close female friends so I don’t know any lesbians. I find women to be very slippery fish.
Lost, I would strongly suggest you try and have a baby. At nearly 30, you are approaching geriatric. If you get to 33 and are still childless, I’d let go of the dream. You don’t want to be at the school gates with the other mums thinking you're the grandma. Get a small dog instead and put the money you would have spent on a child towards a Mallorcan timeshare.
Fundamentally, Lost, it’s like I always say: stop stepping in dog mess, and start stepping into your power. And you’d do well to remember it could always be worse. Enough of the “woe is me” narrative because, if you’re not careful, one day you will wake up and woe actually will be you. Moaning and writing into comedy publications won’t get you anywhere. If all else fails, chill a bottle of Crémant and pop on Queen Charlotte: A Bridgerton Story. That always works for me.
Chin up, Lost.
Gail Summerfield x
Emmeline Downie: Gail is running at Pleasance Courtyard (Attic) Aug 5-30th, 16:35. Tickets here
Read more about Edinburgh Fringe 2026:
